what does this mean?

Devastation.  Vast and epic in scope.  Human suffering beyond anything I can remember in my lifetime.  The incredible suffering of our neighbors in Haiti leaves me troubled and speechless.  I heard the average Haitian lives on less than $2.00 a day.  Two dollars?  Today, like millions of kind-hearted Americans, I will pray for Haiti and contribute to the Red Cross.

What cosmic lotto did I win to have been born in the US and not in Haiti?  Making my plans and assuredly declaring, 'I am going to do this or that....I am traveling there' blithely operating under the illusion of my superior planning and control.

I'm trying to imagine the landscape of my life lying in dust, flames and rubble.  One moment I am surrounded by the familiar and in the next moment the earth violently belches and swallows up my precious, little treasures.  I'm left bloodied and dirty with empty hands looking to the sky.  What the hell is going on?

In the midst of confusion, I will continue to pray.  I will not complain.  Not today.